Imzadi: My Version
Chapters Thirty-three and Thirty-four
Chapter Thirty-three
Deanna was sitting on the sofa with her two children when Chandra rang the doorbell. Chandra had sensed Deanna was not herself clear to her house and had to know what was wrong with her best friend. However, Deanna did not want to be bothered by anyone and even though she knew Chandra could sense she was at home, she did not respond to Chandra.
It had been three hours since Will walked out the door and Deanna withdrew to her immediate surroundings. What was keeping her going at this point were the twins and she did not want anyone else around.
Chandra sent a gentle mind brush, but Deanna ignored it. Then Chandra sent a pleading mind brush. "Deanna, please. I came to check on you and see if you would like to talk."
"I'm fine!" She sent back.
"Deanna." Chandra said with some doubt in the tone she sent.
Deanna sighed. "OK, come in." She sent
reluctantly.
Chandra entered and as she did she asked sympathetically, "What's wrong, Deanna?"
"Nothing! I'm fine!" Deanna sent indignantly.
"Deanna, I'm your best friend."
Chandra sat down beside Deanna and waited for her to reply.
Deanna did not say a word for a few minutes and Chandra was
feeling that the silence was getting menotinous.
Finally, Deanna broke like a dam. "Will's gone!" She cried.
"Gone?"
"Yes." Deanna replied sobbing. "Oh, I knew it was coming, but I didn't quite think it would be this soon."
"He seemed happily married." Chandra stated.
"Oh, that wasn't the problem."
"Then why did he leave?"
"He had a strong desire to be an officer on a ship and not at the Embassy." Deanna told Chandra.
"On a ship? Surely he asked you to go with him?"
"He did." Deanna affirmed.
"Why didn't you go?" Chandra asked shocked.
Deanna shook her head. "I want to return to my studies and I can't do that on a ship. Oh, Chandra!" She cried. "I feel we are going two different directions."
"But you want to join Starfleet one day, eventually,
right?"
"Yes."
"So, I don't get it."
"He's not ready for me to leave the children to pursue a career, yet."
"Oh, I get it. I think."
"Deanna!" Lwaxana thought send came.
Deanna put up a mental mind block, because she did not want to hear a word her mother had to say. Regardless of the mind block, though her mother entered, without invitation.
"Oh, there you are, Little One." Lwaxana said
breathlessly. "I came as soon as I could. Now, tell Mother what's wrong."
"I'm fine, Mother." Deanna stated firmly and gave her mother the angriest look Lwaxana ever seen from her.
"There's nothing wrong."
"Deanna, you can't fool me." Lwaxana said firmly.
"Your eyes are red and your face is streaked with tears. Now what is going on, here?"
"Nothing I can't handle." For the first time in her life she sounded like her husband and she recalled the first time she heard him say those words and tried hard to choke back the tears.
"Daddy gone." Kestra said.
"Kessa!" Will Jr. scolded.
"Oh, Deanna." Lwaxana said in fringed sympathy. "I don't want to say I told you so."
"Then don't!" Deanna yelled at her mother in anger. "You have no idea and I don't want to talk to you about it!"
Insulted and hurt, Lwaxana said, "Oh, fine. You want to talk to Chandra, but you don't want to talk to your own mother!"
"Mother!" Deanna shouted as she stood to face her
mother eye to eye. "You just don't get it, do you? Not even other Betazoids can get through to you!"
"What are you talking about Deanna?" Lwaxana asked.
"You, Mother!" Deanna said with stronger anger than before and pointing a finger at her.
Lwaxana was feeling Deanna was taking something out on her, but she was not sure what. "Deanna, whatever Will said or did, don't take it out on me."
"I'm not taking anything out on you!" Deanna snapped. "I'm telling you to butt out!"
Lwaxana was shocked. "Butt out? W... w... What did I do?'
"What did you NOT do?"
"If you would talk to me, then maybe I could figure out what you are talking about." Lwaxana said.
"No! You don't get it. I want you out!"
Lwaxana was even more shocked than before. She stood and look at her daughter incredulously.
"OUT!" Deanna yelled into her mother's head and pointed to the door. Lwaxana was so blown over by Deanna's powerfully angry mind send, that she almost fell over backwards.
Surprisingly to Chandra, she found herself feeling sorry for
Lwaxana. She even flinched at Deanna's mind sending, herself. Finally, she stood and placed a hand on Lwaxana's shoulder in sympathy. "Mrs. Troi, why don't you give her some time. Then maybe she will be willing to talk to you later. She'll be OK, I assure you."
Deanna had her arms crossed in front of her and with anger still in her voice she said, "Oh, I'll be OK, but I don't think time will eventually cause me to want to talk to her again!"
Lwaxana still could not say a word. "Come on, Mrs.
Troi." Chandra guided the older woman gently to the door. "I promise you, I'll check on her for a while for you and let you know how she's doing."
"I.. I.. have.. no idea..." Lwaxana stammered as she walked out the door still in incredulous shock.
Deanna sat back down as she saw her mother leaving, refusing to say a word to her.
Chandra turned and walk back to the sofa to sit down near Deanna again and sent, "I gather Will's leaving had something to do with her, too."
"He never said it directly, but it was there, too." Affirmed Deanna. "Mostly tried to make a joke about it, instead of saying it out right."
"I can understand that." Chandra said. "Your
mother was not nice to any of us the last couple of times we all got together and that was at your anniversary and shortly after Tebra was born."
"And she was born almost a year ago."
"Deanna," Chandra began. "Are you afraid he won't be back here?"
Deanna got quiet and shook her head. "I don't know. I know, I will eventually take the children to see him and see him then, but as for him coming back to Betazed, I don't know for sure."
"If he said he would..."
"That's just it. I couldn't sense what he was feeling when he left." Deanna stated. "I was too wrapped up in how I felt."
"Well, knowing him, I'd say if he said he would, he
will." Chandra tried to reassure.
Will was on the shuttle heading for the Hood and had been on the shuttle for almost four hours now. He was feeling bad with the way things were left and kept going over it again and again. Trying to figure out what went wrong and when it went wrong. He had no answers, except he knew Deanna was right. He had been feeling very restless for a long time now.
He tried to get his mind off of everything that had happened in the last several hours. He tried getting some sleep, since he had not slept since the night before last, but sleep still did not come for him. He then decided to look over the crew manifest of the Hood.
At first glance the crew looked like a good group of people to work with. There were some new crew members since he was last there and some were the same as last time. Then he saw one name that sent chills up his spine. Not chills of fear exactly, but he just did not like the fact that he would be working with this particular crew member again.
"Gods!" He laid his head back on the back of his seat. Then his thoughts went back to Deanna and all the memories he had with her. As he was thinking about all the memories he thought of the twins and realized that he had not said a final good bye to them before he walked out the door to catch the shuttle. Not even a hug.
"Ugh!" He thought. "That's just great! I'm too busy worrying about Deanna, that I completely forgot to check on them before I left. They're probably just as upset with me as Deanna is."
"Sir," The helmsman addressed Will. "We will be approaching the Hood in ten minutes."
"Thank you." Will said. Then thought to himself,
"I wonder what working with Captain Desoto will be like? I guess I'll find out here in a few minutes."
Chapter Thirty-four
Will got settled into his new quarters and he decided to put in a communique to Deanna and the twins.
Will was disappointed when he had to leave a message for the
third time. "Damn. It's 1900 hours on Betazed. Why isn't she answering."
"Deanna, I don't know if your getting these messages or if you're listening to them, but I just wanted to say, I'm sorry, but I have to be out here. I wish you and the kids would have came with me. I miss you. Call me when you can, Imzadi."
He finally gave in and called Lwaxana. "What did you do to her?" Lwaxana attacked him verbally.
"Nothing, really." Will shrugged. "Except decided I wanted to be on a ship. I asked them to come with me, but Deanna refused."
Lwaxana frowned. "Well, of course she did. She is about to start her studies here in a few days."
"Mrs. Troi, please don't start harassing me."
"Harassing? I'm not harassing, yet."
"Mrs. Troi, just tell Deanna I want to talk to her." Then Will disconnected the link between them.
"Well, that was very curt of him." Lwaxana huff.
"They are both almost as bad with how they talk to me
lately. I'm not sure who's worse! Deanna or Will."
Deanna was listening to his messages. She sat and cried when she listened to them after the children were in bed. She could not bring herself to talk to him just yet.
Days went by and Will tried hard to get her to talk to him. After the fifth day he decided to wait for her to come around and call him. That was when he decided he had to get out of his quarters and went to the lounge.
He walked up to the bar and had a seat. "Scotch on the
rocks." He ordered.
When he received it, he downed it quickly and ordered another. Then he walked back to a corner table to be by himself and nurse the second drink.
When the person he was trying to avoid for the last five days walks in and over to his table after ordering a drink, he knew he had picked the wrong table.
"Well, Billy Boy. Long time no see."
He nodded and tried to smile. "Lieutenant."
"Oh, it's Lieutenant Commander, now. And call me,
Marie." She said, while sitting on his lap and stroking his cheek.
"Um." Will said, feeling a little uncomfortable.
"Marie, I'm married."
"Oh, yes. That's right. Where is the delegate's
daughter?"
"She a.. has other responsibilities and couldn't be
here."
Stroking his cheek again she said, "Oh, that's a shame.
Well, if there's anything you need just holler."
Will's eyes got really wide with shock when she kissed him full on the mouth and he squirmed in his seat. "That's just a sample." She said with a seductive smile, as she walked away.
"Oy," Will said to himself. Then he finished his drink and went back to his quarters.
Lwaxana came by Deanna's house again the day after Will called her, but Deanna was out back with the children and she still did not want to talk to her mother.
"Well," Lwaxana said in her head for anyone
listening, as she stood at the front door. "I'll just go around back!"
She walks around to the back and approaches Deanna. "How long are you going to go without talking to me? I'm your mother, after all!"
"Gwamma!" The twins said in unison and ran up to hug her.
"Well, at least you're talking to me." She sent to her grandchildren and knelt down to hug them. Then she struggled to stand up again and said aloud, since Deanna was ignoring her mentally, "Well, aren't you at least going to help an old lady back up to her feet again?"
Deanna gave no response to her mother. Instead she said,
"Come along children. It's time to go in to eat lunch."
"Can Gwamma stay and eat lunch with us, Mama?" Asked Will Jr.
"Yes, can she?" Kestra also asked.
Deanna was tempted to say no, but she said to herself, "She is their grandmother, though."
Deanna sighed and said, "I guess, if she wants too."
"Oh, no, Deanna." Lwaxana said with sarcasm. "Not if it's too much of an imposition to you. I wouldn't want you to be put out by me."
"Mother." Deanna said turning to face her. "Don't push it."
They all four walked through the back door into the kitchen for lunch. As they were, Lwaxana asked, "What I want to know, is what did I do that you are angry with me, too?"
Deanna decided to make the twins sandwiches by hand today. As she got some bread, peanut butter and jelly, she said without looking at her mother, "What did you not do?"
"Oh, that helps a lot, Deanna."
Deanna continued making the sandwiches and had them made rather fast. She still said nothing to her mother as she served the children. "Here you two go."
"Oh, Daddy's fave wit from Eart!" Will Jr. exclaimed. "I wanna see him on ship!"
"So what does an old lady have to do around here to get
something to eat with her grandbabies?"
Deanna looked at Lwaxana as though she hated her. "Fix it yourself." Then she went to get the twins some milk to go with their sandwiches.
"Oh, really!" Lwaxana exclaimed. "You know, you're worse than Will was the other day! At first I thought it was almost a tie, but now I think my own daughter is more rude and curt to me."
Deanna almost reacted to Lwaxana's statement about Will. She
wanted to ask what he had said to her, but decided she would not ask her mother.
"Will you please call him?" Her mother asked. "I could tell he was very sincere in his desire to talk to you and the kids want to see him. Why don't you visit him before you start classes?"
"No." Deanna said firmly. Then softened a little and said, "I have a lot to do before I start my classes."
"What all do you have that it can't wait until you get
back?"
"I have to get them ready for preschool." Deanna
informed as she got herself a cup of hot chocolate.
"Preschool!" Lwaxana exclaimed. "Oh, no! Not my grandbabies with all those germy children. I'll watch them."
"No, Mother! You won't."
"Oh, Deanna. You can't be serious? And what am I suppose to eat? You know I can't cook."
Deanna slammed her mug on the table and said, "Learn!"
Lwaxana was mortified. "W... W..."
"You are not a Queen for everyone to be at your beck and call!"
The tension level in the room was rising substantially and the children started reacting to it.
Kessa started crying and Will Jr started screaming, "I wanna see Daddy on sip! I wanna see Daddy on sip!"
"Deanna, you're upsetting the children!" Lwaxana
scolded.
"I am not! They were fine until you came!"
"Oh, so I guess their being upset is also my fault?"
Deanna did not say a word to her mother. She just picked up
Kestra and said, "Kestra tired?"
"NO!" She said through the tears.
"I guess it's time for a nap."
"NO NAP! NO NAP!" They both screamed.
"Deanna, take them to see their father, before you start your studies, again."
"If I tell you I'll think about it, will you leave?" Deanna said hostily.
Lwaxana frowned. "If I must, but I do think you need some help with those two right now. I could at least help you with that, if you let me."
"No, Mother. I can handle it."
"OK." Lwaxana said. "Have it your way. I'll go since you refuse to even let me have lunch with my
grandbabies."
"I didn't refuse, I said make it yourself."
"At least my son-in-law was nicer to me than my own daughter is. You don't have to show me out. I'll find my own way, thank you." Then Lwaxana left by way of the front door.
"The back door would have been better for you to
leave." Deanna thought. "Maybe it would knock you down a few levels."
After his shift, Will checked his messages. "Nothing." He said to himself.
Then his comm beeped. "In coming message from Lwaxana Troi, Daughter of the Fifth House of Betazed." said the computer.
"Well, I definitely can't confuse her with anyone
else." He said to himself. "Put it through to my
comm."
The computer screen flicked on and Lwaxana's face appeared.
"Will," She shook her head, looking like she herself could cry. "I can't get through to her. She's not speaking to me, either. I even went to your house and she just acts like she hates me."
"How are the children?"
"Oh, they're fine given all the tension. They want to see you."
"And is she coming with them for a visit?"
Lwaxana shook her head again. "I don't know. She said, 'If I tell you I will, will you leave?' I'm telling you, Will, she's blocked all her thoughts from me and I can't get through no matter how hard I try."
Will sighed. "Thanks, Mrs. Troi."
Lwaxana looked like she felt very bad about the situation.
"I'm sorry that I couldn't do more. Will."
The link was then broken, but not without Will noticing that
Lwaxana looked as though she was also hurt. Will felt some relief that it was not he who was upsetting Lwaxana, this time. If it were she would try to be insulting.
"I think I liked it better when she was insulting
people." Will said to himself.
Then Will decided he would try Chandra and see if she could get Deanna to call him. He put the call through and Teb answered.
"Ah, Teb. How are you?" Will greeted, trying to sound cheerful.
"I'm fine, but I take you want to talk."
"Can't fool, you can I?" Will tried to joke.
"Will, I hear there are problems between you and
Deanna."
"I guess Chandra's told you?"
"Well, from what I gather, Chandra is the only person Deanna is talking to, right now." Teb informed. "Chandra said Deanna was so awful to Mrs. Troi, that she actually felt sorry for her."
"I'm starting to gather that from talking to Mrs.
Troi."
"Do you know why?" Teb asked. "I mean, I haven't been in contact with Mrs. Troi lately, so I have no idea and Chandra didn't say."
"I think I know, but I can't say for sure." Will said.
Teb frowned. "That's a shame."
"Teb, I called to see if Chandra could talk Deanna into
calling me so we could talk."
"Well, she's not here right now, but I'll ask her when she gets back."
"Thanks, Teb. I really appreciate that and I'm glad Deanna is at least talking to someone."
"Me too." Agreed Teb. "I'd hate to see her if she didn't talk to anyone."
"Well, have Chandra call me and let me know if she can't convence Deanna to call me."
"I'll do that." Teb smile. "Oh, and take care out there."
"I will." Said Will and then he broke the link.
Chandra called Will two days later, but Will was on duty when she called, so she left a message. "Will, I'm sorry. She would not talk to me about calling you, but she is listening to your messages. That much I know for sure. As for bringing the twins to see you, she wouldn't say whether she would or not."
Will was disappointed. He had hoped, if anyone could get Deanna to call him, Chandra could. He sat in his quarters, wondering what Deanna was thinking. He felt so shut off from her, but then he thought about how Lwaxana must be feeling, being on the same planet with her and shut off from Deanna, also.
"And she's a very strong telepath!" Will thought to himself.
The chime to his room rang just then. "Come in." He said without thinking.
When he saw who it was he sat up straight. "Oh, shit!" He thought.
"Billy Boy, I haven't seen you for a while." She walked over to him and caressed his cheek. "You seem so down! Is there anything Marie could do for you?"
"I'll need several drinks to answer that question." He replied. "Now could you please leave?" He asked her, trying to keep his composure.
"Oh, but I want to cheer ole Billy Boy up!" She replied kissing him.
"This woman doesn't take no for answer." Will thought. Then he stood. "I really need to be going."
"Where do you have to go this time of night?"
Will suddenly remembered being invited to a poker game earlier and thought it had to still be going on at this time. "Ah, there's a poker game I said I would attend and play a few rounds."
"Oh." She said. "Well, I don't play poker, so I'll catch up with you later."
Will felt like he was saved by the bell. They walked out and he went the oppisite way than she did.
Three days later, Will received an emergency communique at 1100 hours.
"You can take it in my Ready Room if you like." Captain De Soto offered.
Will agreed and walked into the Ready Room to receive the call.
"Will, Deanna's gone!" She cried.
"Lwaxana?"
"I went your house yesterday and she was not there and then I went again today and she's still not there." Lwaxana was talking rapidly and said the whole sentence in one breath.
"The children too?"
"Yes." She sobbed.
"Well, maybe she decided they needed to get out of the house today and yesterday."
"I don't know." Lwaxana said, still sobbing. "I haven't been able to sense a thing from her with her blocking me out."
"Well, keep me posted." Will asked.
"I will." Lwaxana said with tears rolling down her face as she ended the call.
Two hours later Will got another emergancy communique and again took it in the Captain's Ready Room.
This time it was Garth Xerx.
"Will, I'm sorry to bother you."
"It's OK." Will said with concern.
"Well, Deanna was suppose to show up for my class yesterday and today. My class starts a little early. Well,"
"She didn't show?" Will was getting a little concerned now.
"No." Xerx confirmed. "Chandra isn't home, so I called Lwaxana. She told me how Deanna had been acting lately and that she has not seen her either the last two days."
"I'm getting very concerned now." Will told Xerx.
"Have Chandra call me if she knows anything."
"I'll do that." Xerx stated. There was a pregnant pause and then Xerx said, "Well, I'll let you get back to work."
"A... yes. I need too. Thanks for letting me know."
Will spent the rest of the day worrying about Deanna. He was not sure what was going on with her and two people have called also concerned. He had no idea what to do nor even a clue what to do.
It's was 1800 hours and Will had heard nothing more since Xerx called. "Maybe that's good news." Will thought, but as he thought it, the computer announced he had another emergency communique.
Will took it and this time it was the concerned face of Chandra. "Will, I haven't seen her lately either."
"Please tell me it's because you haven't been over to our house these last couple of days."
"I wish I could say that, but I can't. I've gone over there several times today and yesterday. I've sort of been trying to keep an eye on her lately. Father told me he called you and said you wanted me to call you. I went over there one more time, before I called you, just to be sure and still no one is home."
Will sighed. "Where the hell could she have gone!"
"I sense you are very upset, worried and concerned."
"Now you sound like Deanna, but she may have narrowed it down some."
"I wish I knew where she was."
"And you've been over there every day, lately?"
"Yes and these last two days, she and the twins haven't been home."
"No signs of foul play?"
"No. The house is locked and she's just not there." Chandra told Will, shaking her head.
Will was silent for a minute. Finally, Will spoke. "I'll see what I can do on this end to find her and you contact Tang to see if he can put out a search for her and the twins."
"OK, I'll see if I can talk to him now."
"Thanks, Chandra."
Then the connection was again broken. "God! Where the hell could she be! What is she even thinking! Why didn't she inform anyone she was leaving? Deanna said I wasn't acting like myself, what the hell does she call this!"